Welcome to our blog!! Thanks for checking out our journey with 7 crazy kids, including one named Spencer who has achondroplasia, the most commom form of dwarfism. Here you'll find my personal ramblings on raising a child with a physical disability, thoughts on motherhood and faith.

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Monday, March 25, 2013

Authentic Motherhood and Sufficient Grace

I realize often what a hot mess of a Christian I am. There are days I feel like a complete failure. I look at the seven little faces that I mother and wonder how I can teach them anything when I often feel like a dropout  student myself. When I slip and say something I shouldn't; when I tell them to be kind, yet I'm quick to anger, when I tell them to have faith and then I doubt. Sometimes I feel like I mother by "do as I say, not as I do." Those are the days the Devil says to me, "you are not enough."

Motherhood is by far the toughest job out there. There is no Employee Manual to refer to, (for Pete's sake they just let us walk out of the hospital with human being!), no Human Resource Department to voice complaints. You won't get the opportunity to park in the "Employee of the Month" spot. Heck, you may not even get to park in your own garage if your teenager keeps forgetting to take out the trash. And we all feel the eyes of the critics out there. Like a societal Siskel and Ebert, critiquing our parenting abilities. Let's be honest, being a mama is hard and being a Christian mama is probably even harder. Yep, I just said that. It's harder because we know that one day we will give account for the children God gave us. We want to do right by God and by our kids.

I won't lie, I feel the pressure. I want so much for my kids. I want so much to please God and for my kids to please God. One day after I had totally not measured up to where I wanted to be/should have been/could have been as a mom and as a wife. I felt like I'd sort of hit rock bottom. It was then when Christ softly whispered to me, "my grace is sufficient."

Sufficient? Sufficient to mother 7 different kids and all their individual needs, all while falling short myself? Yep, sufficient enough for that. The cool (and scary) thing about kids is that they can smell a phony a mile away. They will call you out on your lack on integrity faster than instant oats. But your kids aren't expecting you to be perfect, they are expecting you to be authentic.

Authentic in how you live your life. They expect you to try every day to live what you say, even if you fall short. They expect you to apologize when you mess up. The expect you to expect THEM to walk the walk and talk the talk when you are living authentically yourself.

Authenticity isn't about measuring up to an unattainable bar of perfection. Which is a good thing, because I'm a weak and sinful person. I'm glad my Savior said, "my grace is sufficient for thee, for my strength is made perfect in weakness." (2 Cor 12:9) When I'm covered in his grace and mercy, his love and kindness I am enough. Maybe I'm even the most "enough" when I'm at my weakest.

So, mama when you're feeling like you don't measure up, like you are not enough, remember that the Savior you fully trust in to take away your sins, is also the Savior that will cover you in his grace and mold you and make you in the mother he desires. Open up his word and let him fill you. His grace and mercy is enough. Through Him, YOU are enough.

Hang in there, your "Employee of the Month" parking spot is just around the corner....

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